It's important that they named the Lord Christ in the last paragraph because I know everyone was confused about just which Lord Christ was born in Bethlehem. May the Lord Jesus bless their mercenary hearts and fill you with pure civilian-killing love.
In a similar spirit, Jack and Nate would like to wish you a Merry Christmas, a Happy Hanukkah, and a peaceful New Year OR THEY WILL BEAT EACH OTHER MERCILESSLY WITH WIFFLEBALL BATS!
Someone needs to call the SPCA because people are out of control with their pets. Look into these dogs' eyes and tell me animals don't have souls and can't experience emotional or psychological trauma.
I did not get rescued from dog racing for this shit.
We'd rather be water boarded.
Ever wonder what happens when someone from Burning Man decides to make a holiday card?
Now, I believe this one was intended to be funny. In fact, it seemed to have required quite a bit of work to make, and as you can tell, the lasting effect is confusion, not hilarity.
And with that, let us look to 2008 to provide us with a bounty of bad holiday taste once more.